Traumatic Experience

I spent the last four days sleeping, just waking up to eat what I would call-missionary food. My meals were either ice cream, noodles, Nido Oriental Soup w/o egg and oatmeal.

When I woke up this morning I was feeling a little better so i decided to finally show up at the office.

I'm 24 and four days ago, I had my wisdom (wizzie) tooth extracted. I was pretty anxious to had it removed since the surgery had been moved twice, first by my dentist and the second time by me after an unexpected monthly period.

The operation did not go as I had imagined it and I realized, however independent I am and how old I am, I will always turn to my mom for comfort. My dentist made it as painless as possible but given that it was a wizzie extraction, the pain was excruciating. Just before my dentist started to pull the tooth, she told me to signal if I felt any pain I could not handle. After many attempts, my jaw felt like it was going to come off so I signalled I was in too much pain. She gave me another dose of anesthesia and proceeded to extract my tooth again. The second dose was no help and I couldn't help but shiver how much pain I would have been in w/o it. When the tooth came off, I felt like my whole left upper molars were all extracted.

My body was shaking from the stress and my mom holding my cheeks helped a bit. I could not wait till she finished with the stitch. She did one, just to keep the socket closed and told me she need not take it off. On my way home, I felt like crying if not for the 1 gallon of chocolate ice cream that my mom bought for me. When I arrived home, I tried to sleep but was too disturbed thinking about what I just went through. That night, I was disturbed that there was blood in my saliva and the whole wizzie area was swollen. I was afraid of the bleeding and what was worse was that I could not swallow my saliva coz it hurt every time my tongue moved. I was not allowed to spit since it my cause my blog clot to dislodge. I really felt like shouting and crying but thought better not to. Shouting would only make my jaw hurt more and I couldn't even open my mouth to two centimeters wide. At 2 am when I couldn't take any more pain, I finally gave up and took painkillers and a medicine that helped with blood clot. It was silly of me to think I could stand the pain. I have ulcers and I practically had nothing but ice cream after the surgery. The next few days was pretty much the same. I slept to avoid feeling the pain but I took my painkillers (which was anti inflammatory) anyway since ice did not really do much in keeping the swelling down. Looking back, I was depressed the whole four days and I could not wait to go back to sleep again after I ate. It did not help that my boyfriend was very busy. It did not help that I had no one to talk to at all.

I never wanted to go back to my dentist but now (after four days) that I feel less pain (despite that it was still swollen) and I can open my mouth wider, I'm excited to finally get my upper and lower ortho appliance. Its a good thing that my upcoming wedding nudged me to have my braces earlier as planned. Couldn't imagine how much pain I would have been if I'd had my surgery done without my mom. I guess no matter how old you are or whether you are married or not, you'll always turn to mom for a small amount of comfort. After all, she took care of me for 16 years...(should be 20 but the four years I spent at college would not count.hehehe)

My advice for those who need to get their wizzie extracted. Go ahead with the operation but please do it on a friday, this was you have the weekend to rest. And take your mom with you...

This is all my fault

I dare not talk to Lem about what I'm going through right now. She had warned me not to be dependent on him again and just go out and have a grand time waiting.

Here I am, in the same situation I was last year. Hay...At least I'm not going out to some bar with the gothic bitch look on. I favored black eye shadow last year, which is totally unlike me.

Food Cravings

After three days of eating nothing but oatmeal, soft bread and ice cream, [Of course there is my daily dose of meds] I'm craving for a well-prepared classy dinner. At lunch I found I can open my mouth a centimeter wider and I can chew food better as long as I avoid the loosened stitch. Damn, I've lost a lot of weight already and having no one to talk to is not helping. I've just been sleeping on the couch for the past three days with the occasional chat and surf. I had my brother set up my notebook on the table beside the couch so I won't have to carry anything.

Now, If I could just have some breaded shrimp for appetizer paired with a really good sauce with wasabi. I'm a big fan of seafood, especially shrimp [and local lobster-the one with only one claw, I don't say this out loud since I'd get a good tease from my family. I had a suitor once who my family called banagan(lobster) since he lived in a town in Samar that was famous for its lobster]. I'd pair it with sparkling wine but this is my dinner so I'd pair it with San Mig Light. I drink wine but I'm more of the beer kind of person, which is just great since my bf likes beer better too.

Now for the main course, I'd like some pasta in white sauce with chicken bits. I like pasta with sweet style tomato sauce but I equally love white sauce with a distinctive garlic flavor. I can cook this dish in two ways depending on how much time I have. When I'm a little short on time, I cheat a little and use Campbell's chicken and mushroom soup as my sauce base. I can also get fancy with the spices and cream if I have a lot of time.

And what would a dinner be without sweets. I can say I'm an expert with dessert since I can bake almost anything. But for my dessert, I'd prefer the classic pana cotta with chocolate shavings. Two years ago, a desert that tastes like pana cotta came out on the market. It was called black sambo which I found to have too much chocolate flavor.

Now, If only I had this kind of dinner instead for toasted bread, cheese and sliced apples, which I now have on a plate in front of me... :-(

...Forgot, I have to learn how to cook adobo. Gosh! I'm going crazy talking about anything. I miss him so...

Something is Bothering Me

The reason behind my nonsense posts this morning was that I seem to have said something wrong that have hurt the person I love and respect the most. Financial issues have gotten in between our relationship plenty of times already since we decided to get married.

I'm not used of asking someone else for financial help and the idea of sharing expenses with him is a new, if not odd, idea to me. He was taken aback with my questions but he must understand that even my family played a small role in my financial status(even when I was a student). I love him so and it hurts me that I have yet made another issue during this time when he just lost a member of his family. Nahihiya talga ako. I'd be really proud and feel special if he does spend something for me (other than the occasional spending for food and movies)...

Hay, can't seem to be making wise decisions or say the right words...

Birthday Coming Up

Oh yeah, my birthday is coming up. And unlike last year, I don't want to spend it in some bar getting drunk. And being dropped at our house by some guys I barely even knew. I was a mess last year. Good thing someone was kind enough to accompany me in my misery.

I remember this restaurant at the four-star hotel that is located at its private jetty. Was thinking of a formal dinner with my family. Only problem though is that there won't be any sunset there. The restaurant gets a good view of the sunrise and I don't think they'd be open that early. But I equally love the water and stars at night so id still get the ambience I'm looking for.

Dunno what my mom is planning though, she mentioned a trip to hong kong or singapore for the family just after the sale of the commercial lot.

Betrayed?...Don't blame me though

Ten Things You Need to Know About Me

1. I'd like to go to Salzburg!

2. I eat ice cream when I feel bad.

3. I hate falling in line, even for food at any fastfood.

4. I like to dress up and watch musical plays.

5. I'd marry anyone who plays the saxophone...if he proposes...hahaha!

6. I like yanni, david benoit and rob costlow.

7. I used to smoke until I got sinusitis.

8. I stay quiet when I'm angry.

9. I buy and drink very expensive liquor on christmas day and new year.

10. I love to cook and bake.